Burning Embers
by Axes-and-Arrows
Summary: Katniss Everdeen has always admired Johanna Mason. Johanna Mason is protective of Katniss Everdeen. Katniss is pretty sure Johanna hates her, but Johanna Mason is unpredictable. Love. Hate. Friendship. Care. But which of these words is the right word to describe Katniss and Johanna's relationship? Joniss fanfiction
1. Chapter 1

I have admired Johanna Mason ever since her first games. Her weakling act amazed me, her acting skills so perfect. She'd somehow managed to convince everyone (including me) that she was weak. That she was not a fighter. And yet after most of her opponents were dead she managed to come out fighting. She's a fiercer, more fiesty, more rebellious version of me. Johanna actually terrifies me. She's determined and that is yet another thing I admire about her. Haymitch, Boggs and pretty much everyone else had been giving me updates on Peeta's condition so I made sure I got Finnick (Johanna's best friend) to let me know how she was doing. Finnick and I had become close during our time in District 13 and he spent every spare moment that he wasn't with Annie checking up on Johanna, so he was the perfect person to ask. I would go myself, but she doesn't exactly like me, in fact I'm pretty sure she hates me, but I do blame myself for everything she's been through.

"Katniss, are you there?" Finnick asks

I snap out of my thoughts, "Yeah, you were telling me about Johanna"

"I was. She's not doing much better. She's scared and she's in a lot of pain, although she won't admit that to anyone, not even me. I think she was hurt the most. Physically speaking of course."

When they got back, I caught a glimpse of Johanna. She was unconscious so she had no idea I'd seen her. She was emaciated and her head had been shaved. She was dotted with bruises and scabs. But most horrifyingly, she looked young. She looked about my age. Hurt. So badly hurt. She'd lost her fierceness. I couldn't even begin to imagine what they'd done to her.

"How does she say shes doing?" I ask to distract myself from my thoughts

Finnick sighs. "She says shes doing 'fan-fucking-tastic'"

"At least she's still sarcastic."

"That's exactly what I was thinking" he tells me as he turns to leave. "Actually, wait. There's one last thing"

I start to worry. Has something happened to her? I mean besides almost being tortured to death because of me. Has there been an accident? Is she okay? Has she died? No, she can't of died. She's too stubborn for that.

Finnick looks over at me. "No, no Katniss. She's okay. Well, I mean she's okay as can be expected"

"Well then, what is it?"

"She wants to see you"

Johanna Mason wants to see me. Why?

"Bu- but she hates me" I stammer

"Just go see her" he tells me. "I'm sure she won't try to kill you"

"What, now?" I ask when I notice him looking at me.

He chuckles slightly running his hand through his hair, "Yes, now"

I slowly make my way down to the hosptial and I bump into Prim there.

"Hey, Prim"

"Hi, Katniss. What brings you down here?" she asks "We hardly ever see you down in the hospital"

"I was talking to Finnick and I thought I'd go see Johanna" I tell her honestly

Prim smiles before looking down at a clipboard in her hand. "That's a great idea. I think she'd like that. She's in room 257"

I thank her and head in the direction she points, but I somehow still manage to get lost.

A doctor walks by with his head down. He wears a name tag saying 'Dr. R Smythe'. He must see the lost expression on my face when he gazes up from the paperwork in his hands. "Are you lost?" he asks

"Yeah" I say gratefully. "I'm looking for room 257"

"Yeah, well some of us actually have things to do" he replies.

I'm taken aback by his attitude as he basically storms past me. I continue to walk down different corridors until I come to a door that says '231-279' I shove through those doors and continue down that corrider. 249, 251, 253, 255, 257. I spent the whole time getting lost that I haven't actually thought about what I was going to say. I've been lost for about half an hour and I decide I can't hold this back. I knock the door loudly. No answer. I knock the door again. Still no answer. I decide to just walk on in.

As soon as I shut the door Johanna says "Just fuck off, you dumb a-"

"Uh," I stammer.

She turns around. "So you finally decided to show up" she says raising her eyebrow quizically. "Didn't think you were coming"

"I got lost" I mumble

"Of course you did" she mutters.

"Johanna, if you don't want me here, I can come back another day."

"I didn't say I didn't want you here."

"You told me to go away only thirty seconds ago" I state.

"You really are brainless, aren't you?" she says sitting up on her bed cross legged and patting a space at the bottom of the bed. I cross the floor towards her "I was talking about my head doctor. He's just ugh."

"Well then we've both met an annoying doctor today" I sigh.

She raises her eyebrow at this again. "Tell me" she urges

"I was lost, like I said. And I saw this doctor and I thought he'd help me find your room but no, he was really mean and wouldn't tell me"

"Sounds like my head doctor" she replies. "I'd love to put my axe in his face"

She laughs suddenly. It takes me a second to place the quote to a time. But I suddenly remember her saying that about her stylist in the elevator. Right before she took her clothes off. I laugh slightly too. I try to compose myself, but Johanna's still laughing. "That's the first time I've laughed in about two months" she gasps clutching her ribs

I look down at my hands. "Anyway, Finnick said you wanted to see me?"

She composes herself. "Uh, yes. Um, I just wanted to tell you that I didn't tell them. I didn't tell them any rebel secrets and I didn't give away any secret plans or anything. I kept my mouth shut so you can stop worrying."

I gasp slightly when I realize what she's talking about. She had been tortured almost to death and she thinks I'm concerned about secrets she knew.

"No, no I don't care about the secrets. I ju-"

"Well then why were you getting Odair to keep tabs on me?"

"What?" I ask. I always assumed Finnick didn't actually tell her I was asking him

"Don't talk shit, Brainless" she sighs. "I know you were getting him to keep an eye on me and report back to you and I don't like it, so I thought I'd tell you myself. I didn't tell them anything"

"No, it's not like that" I insist

She laughs sarcastically. "So what's it like then?" she asks with a wink

I blush. "No, no it's nothing like that. I mean, I would never -"

"You would never what? she asks with a smirk

"I mean I don't care about any secrets. I just wanted to know if you were okay, I'm worried about you, that's all." I retort in a more serious tone.

Her eyes spark with fury "I'm not a fucking child. You don't need to check up on me."

"I know you're not. You're the bravest person I know. I care, Johanna. I'm concerned about you and I don't particularly want to let you rot in here"

She laughs a high pitched sarcastic laugh at that. "Since when the fuck do you care about anyone?"

"What do you mean by that?" I demand, trying unsuccessfully to conceal my anger.

"Your precious little boyfriend was almost tortured to death too and you've seen him how many times? Once?" She retorted.

"How do you know that?" I say with a glare

"Finnick told me."

"Well then I suppose Finnick also told you about how he tried to kill me."

"What?" She snarled. "He tried to fucking kill you?"

I look down at my hands again. "Yeah, I guess. I mean it's not his fault bu-"

"He tried to fucking kill you." She fumed. "Wait, why?"

"I'm not really sure. I mean they - in the Capitol - they uh, did this thing called hijacking... They altered his brain and he's not himself and uh" I stuttered choosing my words as carefully as possible to avoid hurting her further.

She's silent. I've obviously used the wrong words. "Look, Johanna. I'm really sorry if I've said something that upsets or offends you an-"

"I'm fine, Brainless"

"You don't look fine" I state.

"Wow, thanks Brainless, that means a lot" she answers with her tone dripping in sarcasm

"No, I mean you look upset or something"

"You don't say"

I'm about to say something sarcastic back when the door opens. I turn around at the noise and Johanna gazes up.

"You finally get to meet my asshole of a head doctor" she mutters just loud enough for me to hear.

"It's a pleasure" I mutter back sarcastically. And that's the first time I've ever seen a genuine smile from Johanna Mason. She chuckles slightly shaking her head.

"Is something funny?" The doctor asks.

"Yeah, your face" Johanna replies.

I catch sight of his name tag. Dr. R Smythe.

He sees me at the exact same time. "I see you found your destination then"

I nod before looking back down at my hands, (Which I've noticed I've been doing a lot recently)

Johanna laughs sarcastically "Looks like you already have met my asshole of a head doctor"

Doctor Smythe sighs. Johanna shoots a glare at him. "Fuck off" she mutters.

"You're safe here. You don't need to shut people out anymore. You're perfectly safe."

"I'm not trying to shut people out. I'm trying to shut you out, because I don't like you"

When he finally leaves I run my fingers through my hair. "That was a pretty stupid thing for him to say."

"Which part? I thought it was all stupid"

"The part where he said 'you're perfectly safe here' that's a stupid thing to say especially to a victor."

"Ugh, I know. He's a fucking idiot."

"You swear a lot" I observe

"Always have" she replies. "It got worse after my first games"

I don't know why I do, but I reach out and touch her hands which she had folded in her lap. She instantly goes to pull away out of reflex but ultimately decides to keep them there.

"I'm sorry" I whisper

"Me too" she replies

This may not look like much to anyone else. But it meant it to us. It was a sign of mutual understanding. A bond. We'd both been through the horror of the games, and I genuinely think we can someday be friends. I want to be her friend.

"So are you still going to get Odair to keep tabs on me?"

"No" I reply, "I'll do it myself, as long as I'm sure you don't want to kill me"

"You can never be sure though, Katniss. You're quite annoying at times actually. Hell, I'd be doing everyone a goddamn favor if I killed you"

"Funny" I mutter

"Did Peeta actually try to kill you?" She asks. "Or did you just tell me that to shut me up?"

"Unfortunately, yes. He did." I mumble "but it's not his fault" I say snapping to his defence

"I never said it was. I'm just surprised, I didn't think they could do that. Like change his brain and that. I mean, I knew they were assholes, but I didn't think that was possible"

"Neither did I until it happened"

"I didn't even know. I was in the cell next to him, how did I not know? I mean I knew they were doing something, but not that."

"You were in the cell next to him?" I ask in horror

"Yeah" she mutters. "We're very familiar with each other's screams"

The horror must be evident in my face because she simply laughs and says "what did you expect?"

"I expected something like that, but you're just helping me visualise it"

"You're welcome"

"I didn't really want to know" I choke

"My head doctor tells me I shouldn't censor my thoughts"

"What, the same head doctor that you hate?"

"Yeah, that's the guy. He's a total pretentious asshole."

"And you listen to him, why?"

"I usually don't, I try to ignore him, but he's annoying and one day I told him how much of a fuckface he actually was and he was like 'see that's an improvement, Johanna. You shouldn't censor your thoughts' so that's about the only thing I listened to, besides it gives me an excuse to say anything I want anytime I want"

"And let me guess, you're going to use that key piece of advise to be as mean as you like to me until we're both dead?"

"I prefer to say 'until the rebellion is over' but whatever"

"Do you really think we'll win the rebellion?" I ask her

"We fucking better, I did not spend all that time suffering in the Capitol for nothing"

"I hope we do" I state.

"We will." She says "I'm not going to let you fuck up and die, Brainless."

"Is that why you didn't kill me? For the rebellion?"

"Yeah, pretty much. You were annoying as fuck in the arena. I kind of wanted to smash your face in."

She removes one of her hands from underneath mine and brings it up to stroke the side of my face. "But I'm glad I didn't, because it's a nice face."

I blush and find myself lost for words until I finally reply with "Your face isn't too bad either"

"You don't need to lie to me, Katniss. I have seen a mirror, I'm aware I look like shit"

"You don't" I tell her. "And I'm not lying"

"You're such a sap" she tells me

"I know" I admit

We're interrupted by a knock on the door and Prim comes in.

"Hi Johanna. Hi Katniss."

"Hey little duck" I reply "why are you here?"

"Dr. Smythe wanted me to bring this in. He says he doesn't want to be verbally assaulted again, so here" Prim says handing Johanna a clipboard.

Johanna scans her eyes over the writing on it before grunting and setting it on the bedside locker.

"Thanks" she tells Prim through an almost genuine smile.

"No problem, I've got work to do right now, but I'll be in again later" Prim tells her before leaving.

"Does she come here often?" I ask

"Yeah, quite a bit." Johanna confessed. "She's much more bearable than you, doesn't accuse me of trying to kill her, that sort of thing. She's a good kid."

I smile at the warmth in her voice and look up at her through my eyelashes. "How are you feeling?" I ask

"Fucking dandy" she replies sarcastically.

"No, but really?" I ask

"I feel like shit" she admits.

I gently place my hand on her upper arm, unaware of what to do.

Johanna sighs loudly before bringing her other hand up to her upper arm and entwining her fingers with mine.

"Sometimes, you're not too bad, Brainless."


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, I find myself walking down the hospital corridors. I take a quick peek through the glass at Peeta, but nothing's changed. I was ultimately hoping everything was all a nightmare, and that Peeta would be back to normal, but he's not. He's still restrained to the bed, thrashing and screaming. I'm immediately reminded of the neck brace and start to panic, so I quickly turn on my heel and rush out of the room. I walk around a bit, amazed at the largeness of the hospital in District 13. I've stumbled down random corridors in hopes that I don't bump into anyone since I'm not exactly following my schedule right now. I make my way to room 257. Johanna's room.

I knock the door, "Johanna, it's me. It's Katniss. Can I come in?".

"Yeah, sure. Why not?" She replies

I swing open the door and walk over to her, she moves her feet and pats the bed just like she did yesterday.

"Have you seen Annie?" She asks

"I've seen her, but I haven't really gotten the chance to speak to her. Why?"

"I was just wondering how she is. Prim came in last night and told me she was out of the hospital."

"Are you jealous?" I ask raising my eyebrow

"A little, yeah" she admits "I hate this goddamn hospital." Johanna lifts her arm to show me why. She's hooked up to a couple of machines and a morphling IV.

"You'll miss the morphling when it's gone." I whisper

"Maybe, I don't know. What's that on your arm?"

I follow her gaze to my left forearm. "Oh this?" I say referring to the sickly purple ink on my arm. "It's the bane of my life, also known as my schedule. I'm supposed to follow it"

Johanna grabs my left arm in both of hers and reads it. Her thumb strokes lazily over my pulse and I swear for some reason I feel my pulse accelerate rapidly. I hope she doesn't notice it, and to be sure I cough to try and cover it up. "It looks like you're not supposed to be here right now" Johanna observes. I glance down, I'm supposed to be in command. "I don't pay much attention to it anyway"

Johanna chuckles slightly "looks like the mockingjay has finally found her wings. Shame you're defying the wrong president though"

"Hey, rebelliousness doesn't come easy to all of us!" I exclaim

"Yeah" she mutters. "I suppose I do have a natural gift"

"You do" I agree "Have you seen your lovely head doctor today?"

"Unfortunately. You think that stupid schedule thing's bad, you should try listening to that asshole 3 times a day"

I laugh "well, I can think of things that I've been through that are worse than listening to him"

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"I guess it's story time then. Once upon a time I was in an elevator with my pretend boyfriend and a middle aged alcoholic, then out of nowhere a crazy psychopath with an axe to grind walked in. The crazy psychopath brought misery to myself and the people in the small elevator, and then... things got even worse. The crazy psychopath proceeded to take all of her clothes off leaving the people of the elevator in shock and she sashayed out the doors on floor 7"

She genuinely laughs at this. "You must have lived an amazing life for the hottest girl in the world stripping for you to be considered a bad thing. But dint worry, I've got an even scarier story. Once upon a time, I was trying to make friends-" I laugh loudly at this. Johanna scowls at me. "Haha, very funny. As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I was trying to make friends with some other victors and it was going well so I decided to flirt a bit to break the ice, so I flirted in the easiest way possible; by taking my clothes off. Bit then the girl I was trying to flirt with got all pissy and it didn't go the way I expected. The end."

"That's what you get fo- wait, did you say the girl you were trying to flirt with, as in me?"

"No,the other girl on the elevator" she answers sarcastically. "Of course I was flirting with you."

I see what she's trying to do now. She's trying to see if I'm gullible as well as brainless. Well I'm not. "You were clearly flirting with Peeta I state

Even saying his names like a punch in the face. I hope Johanna doesn't pick up on it, and fortunately she doesn't.

"I wasn't trying to flirt with Peeta. I was certainly doing him a favor though"

"How were you doing him a favor?" I ask

"Aw, come on. My boobs were the first boobs that that kid has ever seen"

"How do you know that?"

"Because you said he was your, and I quote, 'pretend boyfriend' and we all know nakedness scares you anyway"

"Nakedness doesn't scare me. It intimidates me slightly, but it doesn't scare me."

Johanna groans. "I'd love to take my clothes off right now and ask you if I was intimidating you. But I don't have the energy, I'm just too tired"

"Finally, a bit of good luck" I joke. "But seriously, you should sleep if you're tired"

She yawns. "Yeah, but if I sleep you'll leave, and even though you irritate me 95% of the time, it's really boring in here and you're not bad company"

"You should still sleep, I can come back when you wake up"

"You say that, but you can't, someone will find you and bitch about you not following that arm thingy, and they'll make you follow it."

"Good point" I say "scoot over"

"What?" She asks a crease forming between her eyebrows.

"Move over, I'm getting in." I say, "and yet somehow I'm the brainless one"

"What the fuck is going on?" Johanna mutters

"You're tired, and I could do with a nap, so we'll sleep" I don't mention it's because I was up all night with nightmares and thankfully she doesn't ask.

"Come on, Katniss. Have some control, I mean I know I'm attractive, but we barely know each other and now you're trying to get into my bed"

"Oh shut up" I mumble

"Fine, here" she says, lifting the covers up for me as an invitation. I clamber in beside her.

Her bed is cold considering she's been in it all day. I figure she must be cold so I cuddle close into her left side just like Prim would do when I was cold.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Johanna grumbles.

"Keeping you warm" I reply

She seems to accept this and she relaxes beside me before returning to staring up at the ceiling.

I wake up about an hour later feeling rested. I slept the entire hour and didn't wake up screaming so I consider it an improvement. I glance up and realize that Johanna's still sleeping.

Johanna does look different when she sleeps. She looks younger, much less fierce and innocent. I remember the last time I saw her asleep, when I caught the glimpse of her being wheeled into District 13's hospital, she looked like she was in so much pain then despite the fact she was unconscious, some of her wounds have healed since and she looks to be in slightly less pain, she also looks slightly happier, or at least a little bit more content. I move so that I'm on my back and I listen to her steady breathing. She stirs slightly and rolls onto her left side so that she's facing me before rolling onto her stomach whilst simultaneously throwing her right arm over my torso and burying her head into the side of my chest. She mumbles something incoherent before settling down into a deeper sleep again.

It's about an hour after that when she finally starts to wake up. She yawns loudly and stretches before sitting up.

"Morning already?" She asks in a cute sleepy voice.

"Nope, it's almost dinner time, I'll have to be heading down to the cafeteria soon"

"I thought the whole idea of you getting into my bed was to sleep and not just to creep on me, and wait, how did I end up on top of you?"

"You moved in your sleep, and anyway you're cuter and less frightening in your sleep so I thought I'd let you continue."

"Creep" she mutters

I laugh lightly at that. "You're one to talk"

"Says the one who practically begged to get into my bed. I mean, I can't blame you because I'm stunning but you kind of showed your desperation there, Brainless"

I decide to be just as much of a tease as she is and I kiss her lightly on the nose. "Thanks" I whisper directly into her ear. "Let's do it again sometime" and with that I get out of the bed and leave swaying my hips just as much as she did exiting the elevator.

I hear her yell after me "That's my thing, Brainless. Don't you dare steal that on me or I swear to fuck I'll smash my axe in your goddamn head!"

I laugh gently to myself and head on up to the canteen.


End file.
